Category: Entertainment

Heavy Devy: Redux

Published on August 2, 2022

Last time I went to see Devin Townsend live was back in 2019, and it didn’t exactly go as planned, as I detailed in my blog post back then. Little did I know what absolute fuckery was about to come out of a wetmarket in Wuhan, China before long.

A couple years have passed, where mother earth was playing a very exciting game of Pandemic with real people. We’re not out of the woods yet, but things are returning to normal, and the disease is no longer considered quite as big a deal as it once was.

Devy’s back, let’s go!

When I saw Devin Townsend was returning to Oslo for his Lightwork tour, of course I just had to have tickets, and so I bought them.

Yay, Lightwork!

Turns out Devy was releasing a new album called Lightwork, and was promoting it on an album tour, including Europe. Sweet!

But the album release was pushed back, and Ticketmaster decided not to let me know that until quite a lot of time had passed. However, Mr. Townsend still went on tour – playing various older songs, and he’s got an amazing discography, so that shouldn’t be a problem. I was able to refund the original tickets, and buy new ones for the other tour, which it turns out he was doing along with Dream Theater.

Being someone who listened a lot to Dream Theater in the mid 2000s, I thought that sounds good to me, and I ordered tickets for me and my girlfriend, and planned a stay with some relatives living a quick train ride away from Oslo. That way I can see relatives, cut costs, and drive my own car most of the way, without having to deal with Oslo traffic and parking and all that jazz. Sounds like a win to me!

Cool & good! They even have a cute kitten.

The logistics went perfectly this time around. No hiccups at all.

If anything went a bit wrong this time around, it might be that Devin Townsend was a warmup act for Dream Theater. His set wasn’t very long, and the audience was mostly there to see Dream Theater, which means they weren’t mostly there to see him, and I think they made that very clear unfortunately.

Devy must have picked up on it, because although he delivered a good show, he seemed almost depressed. Lacking some of the joy and spark I’ve come to appreciate about him. The technical aspect of the performance was great, and he played a very good setlist, so I’m pleased to have seen his show in it’s entirety – including finally hearing Deadhead live without having to leave the venue as it starts, as happened last time. But yes, something was amiss.

The evening devolved into Devy making constant fart jokes, and telling the audience he doesn’t care that they’re not excited, he gets paid either way.

We enjoyed the show regardless, but I hope to see a whole show of him at his best. Then again, he’s weary of touring now from what he’s said. Still, he’s supposed to be back in February 2023, and I might catch his show then.

In my teens I used to listen to Dream Theater daily, but that night they were not my cup of tea, to put it mildly. Being a prog band, it’s to be expected that some of the music gets too esoteric and technical to be enjoyable to most people, and while I like a lot of their discography, I simply didn’t enjoy them that night. It didn’t help that James LaBrie seemed to have gotten hold of some bad amphetamine, with his uncoordinated whirling and jogging around the stage. We left pretty quickly.

After ditching Dream Theater, we headed to a bar called Brewgata instead. Although a bit hipstery, I found it enjoyable regardless. We enjoyed some drinks and a little people-watching before we headed to the train and went home, feeling like the night was a good experience all-round, even though I was a little bit disappointed the crowd bummed out Devvy, which in turn made his performance a little bit less exciting for those few of us who were there for him.

Better than last time, but let’s hope next time is even better!

Behind the Bastards

Published on November 15, 2021

With episode titles like “Hitler’s Drug Problem”, “How Nestle Starved a Bunch of Babies” and “John of God: Oprah’s Favorite Ghost-Channeling Rapist Surgeon” you know this podcast has some wild tales to tell.

**Source:** Banner image for the Behind the Bastards Facebook page.

Hosted by former editor at Cracked.com – Robert Evans, whose career currently includes hosting this podcast, and being an author at the investigative reporting site bellingcat.com, this podcast discusses some of the worst people in history, their backgrounds, and the aftermath of the things they got up to.

I first heard of this podcast when it was new, advertised on other shows under the iheart radio umbrella, but it wasn’t until the death of notorious lunatic John McAfee died, that I decided to listen to Behind the Bastards two-part episode on the subject, titled “John McAfee Is Not Funny Anymore”. They aired in early 2019, so well before he died, and I heartily recommend everyone listen to this remarkable account of a tech mogul who redefined burning the candle at both ends, setting the bar for eccentricity and privilege for what I suspect might be decades to come.

McAfee

Action Park

In 1978, a white-collar criminal by the name of Gene Mulvihill decides to get to the bottom of the age-old question: What happens if we build an amusement park with complete disregard for physics, and federal safety regulations? The answer is Action Park. The kind of park where rides were designed on the back of napkins by someone who doesn’t understand engineering, and the staff are inebriated teenagers. The kind of place where you have to pain the bottom of the wave pool white, so it’s easier to look for corpses.

This water slide was designed with a loop at the end, just like any sane engineer wouldn’t.

Perhaps you wish to light fuel-soaked tennis balls on fire and launch them at workers? Or maybe getting drunk, disabling the speed governor on a go-kart and taking it for a spin on the interstate? How about rolling a cart with no functioning brakes down a track made of concrete, fiberglass and asbestos for a mile, with no safety precautions whatsoever, including not removing the rocks surrounding the slide? If none of these are your speed, perhaps Vernon NJ in the 80s just wasn’t for you. The episode detailing this stuff might be just the thing however.

There are also a few good documentaries on the rise and fall of Action Park.

King Leopold and the Congo

Ever thought to yourself: Other people shouldn’t have hands? Perhaps entertained the thought of stealing an entire country, looting it’s resources, and killing 8-15 million people in the process? Ever wanted to round off your day of genocidal greed by taking your tricycle to meet your teenage prostitute girlfriend?

Well, then you and Leopold II of Belgium have a lot in common.

Leopold II overlaid on images of Africans whose hands were taken in his rubber-production operation.

This arch-bastard stole Congo, turned into a rubber- and ivory factory, and worked it’s population to death. Those who didn’t work hard enough had their hands or feet chopped off as punishment. Meanwhile, he fell in love with a teenage prostitute, who scammed him out of everything he had, and left his children without an inheritance. Probably just as well she did, to be honest.

The full story can be heard on Behind the Bastards, in a two-part episode Robert did on “King Leopold II – The first modern bastard”. A strong recommendation from me, and I’m now reading the book much of the book was sourced from, called “King Leopold’s Ghost” by Adam Hochschild.

This is not my cow.

Published on January 10, 2021

My first brush with the Discworld must have been around 1996, perhaps 97 – when my horrified mother dragged me off to our local equivalent of Blockbuster to return the copy of Mortal Kombat 3 I’d rented for the weekend, because apparently hyper-violent arcade games with depictions of dismemberment isn’t suitable entertainment to an 8-year-old. In retrospect, she might have had a point. While we were returning the game, she asked some people there what might be more suitable for a child my age, someone recommended Discworld.

The European cover art for the Discworld PSX game.

At the time, my English proficiency was poor, making it a confusing and honestly disappointing experience. Did I mention I was 8?

A second beginning

A few years later, somewhere in the early 2000s, I had my 2nd exposure to Discworld, this time, a 2nd-cousin decided to lend me his copy of The Color of Magic, admittedly it was a Norwegian translation and much of what makes Discworld so amazing is lost in translation, plus Terry had hardly found his voice on the first book, but it was definitely interesting enough to stick in the back of my mind.

A few years later, probably around 2005 – my then girlfriend was looking to read something new, and I recommended the series to her. I had only read the first book myself, but she got hooked. Our relationship didn’t last very long, but within the year I had picked up one of the Novels in it’s original English from a bookstore – not knowing publication order or being familiar with any of the recommended reading order charts, I started off with The Last Continent, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Close-up of the cover for The Last Continent, featuring Rincewind

Fast forward about a decade and a half, and I’m a seasoned Discworld-enthusiast. I like the Sky adaptations of Hogfather, Going Postal and The Color of Magic, and I really thought the Amazon adaptation of Good Omens – a non Discworld book co-written by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman – was very well done, and despite some changes, remained true to the source material, this is probably because Neil Gaiman was directly involved in the project. By this time, Terry had passed away and couldn’t be involved himself, but I really think Neil and the rest of the crew did right by him.

Truth, Justice, Freedom, Reasonably priced love, and a hard-boiled egg.

The Watch

A few years ago now, I started hearing chatter about a new show being developed, which would base itself on the novels concerning themselves with the ankh morpork city watch, and would be a sort of “CSI Ankh-Morpork” type of show. Being a storyline drawing heavily on cop dramas and film noir, it makes complete sense to create a show like this. You get the unique chance to play with fantastical elements while delivering a suspenseful narrative and deep social commentary. So I was as giddy as a child for Christmas. To see a more mature take on Ankh Morpork, depictions of it’s underbelly, and introducing my beloved Discworld universe to an even wider audience. Something I could watch with people I’ve recommended the series to, but never bothered to pick up a book.

The Watch, by B.S Johnson

Among many colorful characters on the disc, there once was a fellow by the name of Bergholt Stuttley Johnson, B.S Johnson for short. He had a unique talent for designs that never quite worked as intended. Among his achievements were a maze so small people got lost looking for it, the collapsed tower of Quirm – built out of quicksand because he wanted to do it fast, salt and pepper shakers large enough to be used as grain silos, and a manicure machine now used as a potato peeler.

For his unusual contributions to Discworld society, B.S Johnson was nicknamed “Bloody Stupid Johnson”, and rightly so.

BS Johnson’s cruet set – doubling as grain silo and apartment complex

Meanwhile here on Roundworld, as the inhabitants of the Disc call us, we have our own incarnation of B.S Johnson – Simon Allen. BBC America owned the rights to the show The Watch, and they allowed Simon to get his grubby hipster mittens all over Terry’s literary legacy, and for no apparent reason – except perhaps trying to be artistic and modernize things, perhaps he mistakenly thought he had something interesting to say – he imposed himself on an established universe by a beloved author, with a huge and dedicated fanbase – and turned it into this filthy abomination

Among a myriad of unnecessary changes that add nothing of value whatsoever, we have a lot of pointless swappings of genders, species, professions, introduction orders, personality types and more. Two central characters to the watch are just cut out of the story altogether, the character of Sam Vimes changed beyond recognition from a tough but fair street-wise slum kid – now a stoic police captain who does what’s right even when it’s hard – is now a breathtakingly unintelligent party-animal with no substance. His nemesis, Carcer Dun is now portrayed as Vimes’ old friend who saved him from the streets. This perversion of the Night Watch novel quite frankly turns my stomach.

I can’t properly express my distaste for what has been done to The Watch, but I can genuinely say it feels like the show-runner has gone out of his way to defile Terry’s work. I imagine this is how the family of an Egyptian pharaoh would feel if they knew grave robbers would one day dig up their loved one, so he could be unrolled for entertainment at mummy-parties.

To Simon Allen, I would remind you of words found in Reaper Man, as I think you were derelict in your duty to treat the source material with due respect and care.

Buckethead

Published on June 28, 2020

Soothsayer, performed live. Starts at roughly 25 seconds in.

The story of the guitar virtuoso known as Buckethead is that of a robot raised in a chicken coop – by chickens – wearing an expressionless white Mike Myers-esque horror mask concealing circuit boards and severe chicken scratches.

In memory of his fallen chicken-family fried for food, he dons the KFC bucket as a hat, and plays some of the most mind-blowing guitar play you’re ever going to experience.

A beginner’s guide to Buckethead

This guy is easily one of – if not the – best guitarist(s) in history. He was lead guitarist for Guns ‘n Roses back in the early 2000s, but decided it wasn’t for him. Instead, he decided to do smaller and more informal gigs on his own, and I can’t even begin to say how much I respect that. It shows he’s not about the money. He’s got plenty, but is focused on doing what he loves, rather than what will rake in even more cash.

Buckethead with Claypool Bernie Worrell and Brain

A highly experimental and extremely prolific artist, Buckethead has produced 314 studio albums, spanning various styles, genres and string instruments. He can play sentimental, tender melodies dedicated to close family members, and he can play faster, heavier stuff on the other end of the scale. The man is most definitely a master of his craft.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1sYbbk2yN0o

Buckethead – Siege Engine (album version)

Why, oh Vy?

Published on December 24, 2019

A tale of disappointment, frustration and lessons learned the hard way.

GET HYPE!

Devin Townsend is touring in Europe, and he’ll be playing Oslo!
– Naíve Ranyhyn, 2019

I immediately purchased a couple of tickets for Devins ‘Empath’ tour, with all the tail-wagging excitement of a labrador thinking he’s headed for walkies in the park.

Prepping

The concert was to be held on the 24th of November, a Sunday night, in Oslo. So to ensure I had enough time to get to the venue and enjoy my gig. How best to do that, one wonders?

Where I work, I’m lucky enough to enjoy a flexible schedule, which means in cases like this, I can usually arrange to have a day off, and work the hours back some other way. As long as I give sufficient notice, it’s hardly ever a problem, which I’m thankful for. So I gave ample notice to my boss that I would like to take Monday 25th of November off work, and that was OKed without any fuss. Excellent! Now for transport.

Rental?

I have this old diesel car, a 2001 VW Passat, that has seen a fair amount of mileage. For the past year I’ve noticed some issues with acceleration and have been unable to pinpoint and fix it completely. We found a hole in an EGR valve, which was replaced by a mechanic friend of mine, and we flushed the engine and turbo system as well, but still it struggles to even reach the speed limit in some cases. So I decided I didn’t want to take my car to Oslo, where diesel cars are banned at least some of the time.

Instead of using my car, My roommate and I decided to rent one. We found a rental agency, and found a suitable car. We decided the cost was acceptable, even factoring in the higher level insurance we wanted to get to cover any and all possible damages that might occur, just to be safe.

Shortly before the concert was set to happen, my roommates cousin offers to lend us his car. Being at least somewhat frugal and seeing no sense in giving good money to a rental agency when we can get it for next to nothing, we agree, and decide not to book the car instead. We thought we were clever. Alas, the innocence of youth..

Murphy’s Law

The evening before the concert, the guy whose kind offer of borrowing his car suddenly remembered that he’d forgotten to put the centric rings on when he changed to winter tires.

So. Not that car, then. It was too late to get a hold of a rental too. What do we do? Let’s check buses then!

No buses going quite so late. Maybe a train would work? Let’s look up train schedules.

Oh god, vy?

With the concert starting at 19:00 we saw an opportunity to arrive in Oslo at 18:30, and leave again with the last train out. That gave us several hours for the concert, which should be done by then. Gigs usually last around two hours so we thought we were good. Even including the sound check and encores.

To avoid having to wait for 4 hours and 45 minutes at Nelaug train station – conveniently located in the middle of absolutely fucking nowhere – before getting on the connecting train home, we decided to arrange transport to and from Nelaug by car.

Being a seasoned concert-goer you noticed our mistake right away. We didn’t account for the warm-up act.

Being a seasoned train commuter however, you noticed yet another mistake we made: Thinking that 30 minutes extra would provide sufficient temporal slack for us. But no, Vy had other plans.

Delays

While waiting for the train at Nelaug station, we were informed that the train would be running about 20 minutes late, because they’d decided to pick up more cargo than they had originally planned. This took extra time in and of itself, but there’s an additional delay from the added weight not accounted for. This caused us to arrive in Oslo an hour after schedule.

Vy arrives on time – an event which grabs national headlines:
“*Official spokesperson assures public it’ll never happen again.”*

Haken

We may have arrived an hour late, but it turns out this was just in time for the warm-up act. The one we hadn’t factored into the concert duration when we booked our return tickets. Yeah.. We got an hour of whatever the fuck this is first.

To be fair, it’s our own damn fault. I know there’s always a warm-up act, and the Empath tour poster on the Devin Townsend website even mentions Haken being part of the tour.

So, with the warmup act and the main act sound check concluded, it was time for some of what we came for.

Ain’t never gonna win.

We had to leave after the track ‘Never Gonna Win’ in order to have enough time for the train ride home.

My favorite tracks of this tour being Deadhead, Why?, Kingdom and Spirits will Collide – I was pretty disappointed I didn’t get to hear any of them. But that was nothing compared to the disappointment of hearing the intro to Deadhead just as I was heading out.

Every fiber of my being told me to dig my nails into the wall, refusing to leave until the song was over. Sadly, my voice of reason won out, and I begrudgingly left the concert hall, heading for the train home. God damn, those were some of the hardest steps I ever took..

My face when I’d found my seat on the train home.

Lessons learned

Next time, I’ll book a hotel for the night, and I’ll be taking an early bus.