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Tag: Games

WH40K – Where Bleak Becomes Funny.

Published on March 9, 2026

Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for in the grim dark future there is only war. There is no peace amongst the stars, only an eternity of carnage and slaughter, and the laughter of thirsting gods.

– Grimdark Hams

It’s been years since my last post – a lot has happened in life, and time just slipped by, but recent events in the world has made me want to write about my interests again, and I thought I might start on a lighter note: The Warhammer 40,000 universe is the worst of all possible worlds, and we’re not there*.

*yet.

The number of books, games, and who knows what has been made in the 40k universe could fill my blog and then some, so I’ll keep this uncharacteristically brief.

I recently switched my daily driver computer to Linux because Microsoft – you know, the company that really hates being called Microslop and wishes people would stop saying Microslop. It really annoys them when people say Microslop, so we should maybe stop saying Microslop. We wouldn’t want to hurt their feelings. The feelings that are hurt if we say Microslop.

Click here to read the microslop story on windowslatest.com

…where was I? Oh yes. I switched to Linux because frankly I have about as much use for Copilot in my notepad, clunky 100-click menus, and ads in everything as I have use for a stun gun applied directly to my nutsack. If that’s your idea of a good time, then I’m not here to yuck your yum, but it isn’t my cup of tea.

So, what does this have to do with Warhammer you might be asking yourself, and the answer is that I saw Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine 2 go on sale on steam the other day and decided this was the time to invest a few bucks in it, being quite cheap by now compared to it’s new release sticker price. For the uninitiated, it’s basically a game where you play as sentient testosterone, slashing bugs to death with a chainsaw.

Ultrasmurfs begging for the sweet release of death, or possibly paint thinner.

I bought it, downloaded and installed it, launched it, and started the game. So far so good. Then I took about seven steps and the game froze. Less good. A quick duckduckgo lead me to a forum thread that explained that I should make sure drivers are updated, make sure I’m using the experimental proton layer, and one more thing.. oh yeah – trick the game into thinking my desktop computer is actually a steam deck. For some reason that worked just fine.

In the intro mission you’re this 7ft+ tall guy in thick metal armor, probably all in all weighing at least half a ton or more, doing that red bull stratosphere jump but without a parachute, and you just get back up, dust yourself off, and carve your way through the jungle to *checks notes* detonate a WMD, a virus bomb in the atmosphere. The same people that laud this will start frothing at the mouth and shouting incomprehensibly if they see a female character that they personally wouldn’t jerk off to, and try to hide it behind realism.

“Chat, are we cooked?”

These are probably the same people who enjoy playing BG3 with the “anti woke” mod pack, and Withers big naturals mod just to be on the safe side.

So, current events. With the Americans deciding to let Donald Trump back into power, he decided to kidnap the venezuelan president, threatened to annex greenland and depleted their tomahawk missile stock on Iranian schoolgirls – a move true republicans like John McCain wouldn’t supp-

-ort.. Well, this is awkward.

Well, it made me want to think of something lighter and brighter, like a sci-fi world where bdsm elves might turn you into living furniture or perhaps some whimsical inquisitor decides your entire planet is unfit, and condemns it to be stripped of life.

Sourced from https://www.reddit.com/r/Warhammer40k/comments/109yeke/krieg_on_garden_world/

Hopefully I’ll feel like writing before another four years have passed. Perhaps I’ll recount some of what’s happened in the meanwhile.

Yeet or be yoten

Published on September 21, 2019

Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one.

– Terry Pratchett

Three days ago I chose to reinstall a video game called Divinity: Original Sin 2 (DOS2 for short), this was on the two-year anniversary of it’s launch. This post is going to be about that game, and why it’s worth playing.

DOS2 is a role-playing game set in a richly developed fantasy realm. If this seems exceedingly childish and uncool, then this post probably isn’t for you, but you’re welcome to read regardless.

https://i.imgur.com/nLxZDWB.jpg
The ever charming Lord Withermoore

Larian Studios – the development team responsible for creating DOS2 – have an almost unique attitude to the relationship between product and consumer: They understand that games are meant to be fun. A revolutionary concept in a market so dominated by easy cash grabs.

https://i.imgur.com/F4FfrMn.jpg
Sir Lora, a very serious squirrel.

DOS2 is a lot like playing D&D with a fun GM that sets clearly defined sensible rules, and then lets you abuse those rules until it just about breaks the game, and they don’t mind at all – in fact, they encourage it.

First and foremost, DOS2 is a campaign with pre-defined quests. There are milestones you need to get past, but you’ve got a lot of freedom in terms of how you want to reach those milestones.

Yeet or be yoten

Currently, I’m making my way through the game for the second time. My current strategy is to stuff my backpack with heavy items, and lobbing this suspiciously spacious and above all indestructible backpack at enemies. Focusing on Wits and Scoundrel for my stats, I get an increase to critical strike chance, critical strike damage, initiative which is high enough to always get the first move in combat – and some points in Telekinesis to allow me to fling this backpack around like it’s nothing, despite the fact that it’s about as dense as a neutron star.

A quick intro of the telekinesis bag build, by me.

Other ways to break the game

So it turns out that this is far from the only way to make clever use of game mechanics. You could make infinite money with herb gardening, and use that infinite money to buy high quality items. You can also use your herbs to brew tea, which has the interesting effect of reducing the cost of your abilities to 0 if you drink enough of it, making you an unstoppable force.

Tea farming is a legitimate way to master DOS2 as demonstrated by The Spiffing Brit

You can also combine a series of spells in such a way that when the enemy takes damage, you are healed, and when you are healed, your ally is healed – except your ally is undead or afflicted with decaying touch which means he takes damage instead, and then you can make it so that your ally cannot die for two turns, and also make it so any damage taken by your ally is also mirrored to your enemy. I’m sure you can see where this is going.

And then.. Then there’s whatever completely insane gamebreaking black magic fuckery this is:

BruceWillakers demonstrating DOS2 Barrelmancy.

SsethTzeentach reviews SS13

Published on August 18, 2019

Space Station 13 – Best game ever made?

SsethTzeentach reviews Space Station 13

This game is so delightfully absurd, barely even limited by the collective imagination of it’s players. It may be the best game ever made, as Sseth illustrates in this video, which I strongly recommend checking out. I have very little to add to this, except to say: this youtuber is well known for his dark sense of humor, so this isn’t necessarily for everyone. It is however, spot on for me.